There is an old joke that says, “3 out of 4 people suffer from mental disorders. Look around. If three of your friends seem normal, it’s you.” I understand that this joke is politically incorrect. But, I’m not telling it for the laugh factor. I’m using it as an example.
Have you ever had one of those days when everyone seems to be upset with you? What about those days where it seems that everything you say is taken wrong by the people around you? Have you had those? Well, being the self-centered human beings that we are, our immediate thought tends to be: “Everyone is so sensitive lately.” But it is naive and foolish to think that. What are the chances that YOU are the “normal” person and EVERYone else around you is suffering from a case of emotional trigger-happiness. The chances are quite slim.
What can you do then? If you are honest enough with yourself, it is quite probable that you will find out what wrong you are committing. And I’ll be the first to admit that I have caused my fair share of conflicts. But there are times when I cannot, for the life of me, figure out what I have done. So, I approach those who seem to be antagonistic to me at the time and I get the proverbial, “no!” when asked “are we fighting?”. What do you do then? Do you just shrug it off? Do you blame yourself for the misunderstanding? Do you believe them when all evidence points to the contrary? What do you do? What can you do? From experience, you just let them be. Let them be upset. Let them be angry. Let them be easily agitated. “This too shall pass” is what I have done in the past. But is that the right thing to do? Is that the effective thing to do? What then is the right or effective thing to do?
There seems to be this dichotomy between people wanting their space but at the same time getting more and more agitated the longer the conflict seems to remain unspoken. How do you resolve these seemingly paradoxical desires?
I cannot, for the life of me, figure out how to solve a conflict in which all evidence points to its existence save the person you are in conflict with. What do you do then?
